In the romantic movies the prince comes and tells to the princess, that marry me, I will do my all to make you happy. And so he does. They get each other and live happily together ever after.
You could maybe also be happier if your ”someone” could just be different. Not causing you so many troubles, so much worries, so much sorrow. Not treating you sometimes so badly, not ripping out all your self-confidence and life joy.
You could be happier if there were no sickness and sorrows among your family and friends. If your boss would appreciate you more, pay the better salary or give recognition. If your friends would care more about you and not live so far away. If your kids just were a bit easier and helpful and your dog would not bark so much.
That all might be true. But…. No-one around you, except yourself, can make you truly happy.
Happiness does not mean that your life is just dancing on the roses or orchids or on whatever flowers you love. It does not say that everything in life goes just like you want.
It means that you try to be optimistic and loving towards yourself and the other people, especially to your close ones.
When you take care of your happiness, good relationships are a big part of that package. That is one of the truths found by all scientists dedicated to happiness research.
It means that you don’t let others treat you regularly unfair or badly – and if necessary, you tell that them firmly and friendly.
Sometimes other people still manage to hurt your feelings. Do not take that personally, remember it is their view of the world, not yours. What they say, is not the objective truth. You decide if you let it influence you.
Remember, that people who tend to treat others badly and unfair are usually unhappy. That’s their personal problem, and they should try to do something about it. In your heart send them your loving thoughts and forgiveness.
If the other people have worries and sorrows, you should understand them but not swim in the dark waters with them. They are in need of more light, not dark.
Even in bad situations there are always something, which is okay or at least could be even worse. If you can show them a bit light, you will make their dark roads easier to navigate.
According the many scientists helping others can be a big source of your happiness – as long as you do it because you want.